From June 9 – 12 at the Missouri Military Academy in Mexico, Missouri twenty-four young ladies will take place in the [Miss Missouri Scholarship Pageant]. They will all be competing in talent, bikini, and evening gown in order to become the next Miss Missouri. The winner will earn a trip to the Miss America pageant in January 2011. The full gallery is [here]. Let’s take a look at a few of the contestants.
Kari Gai – Miss Kansas City
On Feb. 20, 2010 Kari Gai was crowned Miss Kansas City. She graduated from the University of Central Missouri with a degree in Science Education, is working towards her masters degree, and teaches eighth grade science in Lee’s Summit, Missouri. [Kari Gai’s Blog]
Claire Thorpe-Klinsky – Miss Metro St. Louis
Claire Thorpe-Klinsky graduated from Wesclin in Trenton, Illinois, and went on to play softball at Millikin University where, as a freshman, she led the team in earned run average. She’s busy promoting a healthy lifestyle, especially for today’s youth.
Jessica Sullivan – Miss Springfield
Jessica Sullivan, as far as I can dig up, is a graduate from MSU. She is very involved in fighting the battle against eating disorders even going as far as taking it up with our [state legislators]. Next up is… OMG!!! WHAT IS THAT!!?!?!??!!
Courtney Roe – Miss Southwest Missouri
Compared to the first three contestants above it looks like a cat coughed up a huge hairball, then ate it, and then coughed it up again. It sucks when you’re first runner-up in a pageant, and the winner [moves away] to Texas. There’s no way it could get any uglier than this.
Jennifer Terry – Miss Texas County
I was wrong.
Author’s Note: While this is immoral and satarical humor, my heart is not completely cold and barren. I wish all the ladies who are participating to become the next Miss Missouri the very best.